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Confessions of a Caricaturist

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William Dean Howells Not squirrels in the park aloneHis love and winter-kindness own.When Literary Fledglings tryTheir wings, in first attempt to fly,They flutter down to Franklin Square,Where Howells in his "Easy Chair"Like good Saint Francis scatters crumbsOf Hope, to each small bird that comes.And since Bread, cast upon the main,Must to the giver come again,I tender now, long overtime,This humble Crumb of grateful rhyme. (See )

Napoleon I like to draw Napoleon bestBecause one hand is in his vest,The other hand behind his back.(For drawing hands I have no knack.)  

Dante If you should ask me, whether DanteDrank Benedictine or Chianti,I should reply, "I cannot say,But I can draw him either way."  

Theodore Roosevelt The ways of Providence are odd.If Theodore means "The Gift of God,"Let us give thanks, at any rate,The Gift was not a duplicate.    

Rudyard Kipling I seem to see a Shining One,With eyes that gleam, now fierce, now tender,Through Goggles that reflect the Sun"With more than Oriental Splendor";I see him sitting on a chestHeavy with padlocks, bolts, and cording,Where Untold Treasures hidden rest,Treasures of Untold Yarns he's hoarding.Oh, Rudyard, please unlock that chest!With hope deferred we're growing hoary;Or was it all an empty jestYour saying, "That's another story"?  

Ignace Jan Paderewski When Paderewski is forgot,Our children's children, like as not,Will worship in the Hall of Fame,Some great piano-maker's name.  

Daniel Frohman I love to picture Daniel FrohmanIn costume of a noble Roman.For Dan has just the style of hair,That Julius Cæsar used to wear.  

Charles W. Eliot And now comes Dr. Eliot statingThat Hell won't bear investigating.It looks like Charlie's out to bustThe Great Hell-Fire Insurance Trust.  

J. Pierpont Morgan In Rome, when Morgan came to town,They nailed the Colosseum down.A great Collector! Once his FadWas Coins, but when in time he hadCollected all the coin in sight,To Europe's Art his thoughts took flight.But let not Europe palpitateFor fear of an Art Syndicate.There are more Rembrandts, strange to say,Than ever were in Rembrandt's day;And statues "planted" in the sandWill always equal the demand.  

Gilbert K. Chesterton Unless I'm very much misled,Chesterton's easier done than said.I have not seen him, but his looksI can imagine from his books.  

Guglielmo Marconi I like Marconi best to seeBeneath a Macaroni treePlaying that Nocturne in F SharpBy Chopin, on a Wireless Harp.  

George Bernard Shaw The very name of Bernard ShawFills me with mingled Mirth and Awe.Mixture of Mephistopheles,Don Quixote, and Diogenes,The Devil's wit, the Don's RomanceJoined to the Cynic's arrogance.Framed on Pythagorean plan,A Vegetable Souperman.Here you may see him crown with bayThe Greatest Playwright of his day; Observe the look of Self DistrustAnd Diffidence—upon the bust....