The Council of Dogs

Excerpt

COUNCIL OF DOGS.

Why aCouncilofDogswas convened on the Plain,
ThePresident Sheep Dogthus rose to explain.—
"This meeting I call, to complain of misusage
From the poets, who now a days have a strange usage
Of leading up Insects and Birds to Parnassus,
While, without rhyme or reason, unnotic'd they pass us.—
Declare then those talents by which we may claim
Some pretensions, I hope, to poetical fame.—
Iboast of whole legions, my voice who obey;
Without me the Sheep, e'en the Shepherd, might stray—
But no more of myself—Let each Dog of spirit
Stand forward and modestly state his own merit.
But I charge you be gentle, let's hear of no growling,
No grinning, no snarling, no snapping, no howling."
TheGreyhoundfirst rose, with a spring from his seat,
Scarcely bending the grass, that grew under his feet;
His figure was airy, and placid his mien;
Yet to flash in his eye indignation was seen.—
"Brave companions," said he, "shallwenoble beasts
Hear ofButterflies BallsandGrasshoppers Feasts?
Hear dinned in our ears, wherever we roam,
TheMask seeing LionandPeacock at Home?
Shall we hear all this, nor assert the fair fame
That for ages long past has distinguished our name?—
Forbid it ye Dogs!—here behold me stand forth,
To proclaim to the world my deserts, and my worth!—
Keen and swift in the chace, I can boldly declare
From my speed, as I follow, in vain flies the Hare;
Nay, while like the wind, I bound over the course
My master comes lagging behind on his Horse.
'Twixt friends, I could laugh, at beholding the fuss
And boasting men make of success due to us;
The truth is so obvious 'tis scarce worth enforcing;
Without our assistance they could not go coursing."

"Then the hound & the Grey-hound both flew at the poodle"

"All you say," quoth theHarrier, "dear coz, is most true,
Yet I think it but just, to give each Dog his due;
So don't be offended ifIdare disclose
Thatyouare not gifted, like me, with a nose."
When thePoodleheard this, he laugh'd out aloud,
And all the Curs grinned, who were mixed in the crowd:
Then the Hound and the Grey-hound both flew at the Poodle
And called him a curl-coated Cur, and a noodle—
Poor Poodle was frighten'd at what he had done,
But being himself much addicted to fun,
And having no notion of running by scent,
He could not conceive the Hound seriously meant
To say, that the Grey-hound had no nose at all,
When he'd one twice as long as his own, tho' 'twas small.
"Come have done with your jaw," said theFox-houndin spleen,
"For how should a foreigner know what you mean?
May-hap he can dance, and I'm sure he can beg;
Let him run me a race, and I'll tye up a leg;
But in hunting, in truth, theHarrierandBeagle,
No more equal us, than the Hawk does the Eagle;
Trotting after a Hare is mere childish play,
It may now and then serve, to kill a dull day.
Butwe, at sun rise, seek the Fox in the cover,
Drive him often before us, ten counties half over;Sweep wild o'er the hill, or close at his brush
Unchecked thro' the gorse, and the river we rush,
And Phœbus once more must sink down to his nest,
E'er we slacken our chace, or betake us to rest;
So tempting our sport, Men think it atones
For the maiming of limbs and the breaking of bones."
Said theStag-hound—"All rivalships here I disclaim,
Since for strength, and for speed, so well known is my fame,
That I justly am reckon'd the first amongst hounds:
Yet our chace like theFox-hounds, with danger abounds,
Nay, is sometimes attended with fatal effects,
As in hunting of Stags, menhavebroken their necks."
"Oh pray say no more," said a poormeagre cur,
"It grieves me to think men such dangers incur;
To mankind, I'm a friend of the genuine breed,
A friend little known, but in th' hour of need;
By this string round my neck I guide my poor master,
And true to his touch, I go slower or faster;
Oh Pity his sorrows, for he is stone blind,
And without my assistance his way could not find;
But I lead him with caution through Alleys and Streets,
And rejoice to observe the relief that he meets:
And when to our lodging at night we repair,
Of the food he's collected, he gives me a share."

"Then a Spaniel advanced with a courtier-like mien"

Then aSpanieladvanced, with a courtier-like mien,
His manners were gentle, his coat soft, and clean,
His nose was jet black, and his ears were so long,
They swept on the ground, as he passed through the throng,
Thus he spoke—
"We boast to mankind an attachment so pure,
That docile, and patient, their blows we endure:
We can hunt, we can quest, and what's more we can trace
A descent long ennobled by favour and grace;
For our ancestors portraits are still to be seen
With those of theBabesofKing Charlesand hisQueen."
"You boast of your rank, Sir," theWater-dogcried
As he shook his rough coat, that was scarcely yet dried,
"But in sport who with me can compare?—have you seen,
Where the bush-fringed pool is mantled with green,
How I wind, thro' the reeds and the rushes, my way,
And the haunt of the Snipe, or the Mallard betray...?