Excerpt
December 9, 1914.
CHARIVARIA.
We are told that "it is confidently believed by the advisers to the Treasury that the new issue of £1 notes cannot be successfully imitated." We think that it is a mistake to put our artists on their mettle in this way.
A black eagle, a contemporary tells us, was seen one day last week at Westgate-on-Sea. A Prussian bird, no doubt, in mourning for lost Calais.
The German Government has declared timber contraband of war owing to its alleged scarcity in Germany. Surely, as Douglas Jerrold suggested on another occasion, the German authorities could find plenty of wood in their own country if they only put their heads together?
The news that "Bantam" battalions are now being formed all over England is said to have greatly interested General Kluck.
The report that the Prime Minister spent last week-end in the country is said to have caused intense annoyance to the Kaiser, who considered that it showed a lack of respect for His War.
A map of the United Kingdom published in the Berlin Lokalanzeiger depicts the Mersey as being located in the West of Ireland. Frankly, we are surprised at the Germans showing any Mersey anywhere.
Mr. John Ward has been accused of perpetrating a mixed metaphor when he warned the Government, the other day, that "they would wake up and find the horse had bolted with the money." Is it not, however, a fact that when a horse bolts he sometimes takes a bit between the teeth?
The financial expert of The Observer, in referring to the War Loan, said:—"From all over the country the small investor rallied in his thousands." But he had just said that "the applicants were enormous." Possibly the truth is somewhere between the two—say about 11½ stone.
A football pavilion in Bromley Road, Catford, was entirely destroyed by fire last week. We are trying to bear the blow bravely.
There would seem to be no limit to the influence of the Censor. Here is the latest example of his activities:—
"MEXICOGeneral Blanco EvacuatesThe Capital."We must confess that we fail to see what British interest is served by withholding the General's name.
The German Imperial Chancellor has now repeated, in the presence of a full-dress meeting of the Reichstag, the old falsehood about Great Britain being responsible for the War. This, we believe, is what is known as Lying in State.
And the statement that Germany need have no fears of a food famine may be described, we take it, as a Cereal Story.
Sven Hedin has received the honorary degree of Doctor from Breslau University—as a reward, presumably, for doctoring the truth.
"German Preparations In Belgium.6-Mile Guns in Position."—Star.
It sounds like a 30,000 foot cinema film.
IN A GOOD CAUSE.
The least that we others can do is to see that those who have joined the colours don't have too dull a time in camp during the long evenings. Messrs. John Broadwood and Sons are organizing concerts which will serve the further good purpose of helping many professional musicians whose incomes have been reduced by the war....