They all climbed up on a high board-fence—Nine little Goblins, with green-glass eyes—Nine little Goblins that had no sense,And couldn't tell coppers from cold mince pies;And they all climbed up on the fence, and sat—And I asked them what they were staring at. And the first one said, as he scratched his headWith a queer little arm that reached out of his earAnd rasped its claws in his hair so... more...

MY PET RECIPES TRIED and TRUE CONTRIBUTED BY THE LADIES AND FRIENDSOF ST. ANDREW'S CHURCHQUEBEC "We may live without poetry, music and art; We may live without conscience, and live without heart; We may live without friends; we may live without books; But civilized man cannot live without cooks."—Owen Meredith. QUEBEC "DAILY TELEGRAPH" PRINTING HOUSE 1900 Rhymes to Remember...... more...

MORE THAN SATISFIED! (With Mr. Punch's apologies to the Daily Telegraph's "Academic Enthusiast.") "She-Pantaloons? seedy? Now, do we look like it?" The speaker was a tall, robust maiden with fair hair; on her knee was an edition (without notes) of the Anabasis of Xenophon, and by her side was Liddell and Scott's Lexicon, in which she had just been tracking an... more...

THE WIFE CATCHERS. A LEGEND OF MY UNCLE’S BOOTS. In Four Chapters. Haberdashers, continued my friend the boot, are wonderful people; they make the greatest show out of the smallest stock—whether of brains or ribbons—of any men in the world. A stranger could not pass through the village of Ballybreesthawn without being attracted by a shop which occupied the corner of the Market-square and the main... more...

MODERN TYPES. (By Mr. Punch's own Type Writer.) No. XVIII.—THE UNDOMESTIC DAUGHTER. The race of daughters is large, but their characteristics, vocations, and aptitudes, are but little understood by the general public. It is expected of them by their mothers that they should be a comfort, by their fathers that they should be inexpensive and unlike their brothers, and by their brothers that they... more...

Richmond Palace Richmond has comparatively but few antiquarian or poetical visiters, notwithstanding all its associations with the ancient splendour of the English court, and the hallowed names of Pope and Thomson. Maurice sings, To thy sequester'd bow'rs and wooded height, That ever yield my soul renew'd delight, Richmond, I fly! with all thy beauties fir'd, By raptur'd poets... more...

LADY GAY'S SELECTIONS. Yacht "Ibex," Weymouth. DEAR MR. PUNCH, Once again "my foot is on my native heath."—(I don't know where this quotation comes from, but presume the author of it had lost a leg, or he would have placed his feet there—or else he must have had one leg shorter than the other, and so couldn't put both down at once!)—and heartily glad I am to be... more...

LOCOMOTIVE FOR ST. GOTHARD RAILWAY. We give engravings of one of a type of eight-coupled locomotives constructed for service on the St. Gothard Railway by Herr T.A. Maffei, of Munich. As will be seen from our illustrations, the engine has outside cylinders, these being 20.48 in. in diameter, with 24 in. stroke, and as the diameter of the coupled wheels is 3 ft. 10 in., the tractive force which the... more...

LETTERS TO ABSTRACTIONS. NO. VIII.—TO LAZINESS. BEST (AND BEST-ABUSED) OF ABSTRACTIONS, My heart positively warms to you as I write. At this precise moment I can think of a hundred different things that I ought to be doing. For instance, I have not written to TOM, who is in the wilds of Canada, for months. His last letter ended with a pathetic appeal for an answer. "Never mind, old chap," he... more...

MR. PUNCH'S POCKET IBSEN. (Condensed and Revised Version by Mr. P.'s Own Harmless Ibsenite.) No. IV.—THE WILD DUCK. ACT III. HIALMAR's Studio. A photograph has just been taken, GINA and HEDVIG are tidying up. Gina (apologetically). There should have been a luncheon-party in this Act, with Dr. RELLING and MÖLVIK, who would have been in a state of comic "chippiness," after his... more...