Periodicals Books

THE MUD LARKS. When I was young, my parents sent me to a boarding school, not in any hopes of getting me educated, but because they wanted a quiet home. At that boarding school I met one Frederick Delane Milroy, a chubby flame-coloured brat who had no claims to genius, excepting as a littérateur. The occasion that established his reputation with the pen was a Natural History essay. We were given five... more...

TOWN THOUGHTS FROM THE COUNTRY. (With the usual apologies.) Oh, to be in London now that April's there, And whoever walks in London sees, some morning, in the Square, That the upper thousands have come to Town, To the plane-trees droll in their new bark gown, While the sparrows chirp, and the cats miaow In London—now! And after April, when May follows And the black-coats come and go like... more...

A QUEER CHRISTMAS PARTY. I remember coming home and dressing to go out again. Of this so far I am sure. I remember too taking a cab; also the cab taking me. But oddly enough though I dined that evening with a very old friend, somehow I cannot for the life of me, at this moment, call to mind his name or remember where he lives. However, the evening was so remarkable that I at once sat down next day to... more...

An officer of the Special Patrol Service dropped in to see me the other day. He was a young fellow, very sure of himself, and very kindly towards an old man. He was doing a monograph, he said, for his own amusement, upon the early forms of our present offensive and defensive weapons. Could I tell him about the first Deuber spheres and the earlier disintegrator rays and the crude atomic bombs we tried... more...

WAYS AND MEANS. I met her at the usual place, and she looked much the same as usual—which astonished me rather. "Now that we're engaged," I began. "Oh, but we aren't," said Phyllis. "Are you by any chance a false woman?" I asked. "You remember what you said last night?" "I do, and what I said I stick to. But that was pleasure, and this is business." I... more...

CHARIVARIA. The German claim that as the result of the Zeppelin raid "England's industry to a considerable extent is in ruins" is probably based on the fact that three breweries were bombed. To the Teuton mind such a catastrophe might well seem overwhelming. A possible explanation of the Government's action in closing the Museums is furnished by the Cologne Gazette, which observes... more...

April 14, 1920. "Hat-pins to match the colour of the eyes are to be very fashionable this year," according to a Trade journal. This should be good news to those Tube-travellers who object to having green hat-pins stuck in their blue eyes. Enterprise cannot be dead if it is really true that a well-known publisher has at last managed to persuade Mr. Winston Churchill to write a few words... more...

FINANCIAL OUTLOOK. The Figures. Our receipts for seven months to April 30th are, from donations, $118,051.25, estates, $20,308.09, incomes, $4,829.21, tuition, etc., $22,719.89, United States Government for Indians, $9,540.87; total, $175,449.31. Our payments to April 30th are $203,777.45. Debt balance, $28,328.14. The Meaning of the Figures. These figures mean a debt—growing at the rate of $4,000 a... more...

THE GREAT CREATURE. That “great creature,” like some other “great creatures,” happened, as almanacs say, “about this time” to be somewhat “out at elbows;”—not in the way of costume, for the very plenitude of his wardrobe was the cause which produced this effect, inasmuch as the word “received” in the veritable autograph of Messrs. Moleskin and Corderoy could nowhere be discovered... more...

INTRODUCTION. VOLUME I.—JULY TO DECEMBER, 1841. Early in the month of July, 1841, a small handbill was freely distributed by the newsmen of London, and created considerable amusement and inquiry. That handbill now stands as the INTRODUCTION to this, the first Volume of Punch, and was employed to announce the advent of a publication which has sustained for nearly twenty years a popularity unsurpassed... more...