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Various
CLOTHES AND THE POET. ["The public will welcome an announcement that the standard clothing scheme may be revived on a voluntary basis."—The Times.] I do not ask for silk attire, For purple, no, nor puce; The only wear that I require Is something plain and loose, A quiet set of reach-me-downs for serviceable use. For these, which I must have because The honour of the Press Compels me, by...
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Owen Seaman
CHARIVARIA. The German claim that as the result of the Zeppelin raid "England's industry to a considerable extent is in ruins" is probably based on the fact that three breweries were bombed. To the Teuton mind such a catastrophe might well seem overwhelming. A possible explanation of the Government's action in closing the Museums is furnished by the Cologne Gazette, which observes...
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Owen Seaman
CHARIVARIA. "His seventy-one years sit lightly on Mr. Gibson Bowles," says the Special Correspondent of The Evening News. No doubt Mr. Bowles has some good reason for permitting this familiarity, for he is not a man to be lightly sat upon. "In particular," says a report on the resources of German East Africa, "the President of the Silk Association has just directed attention to the...
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Owen Seaman
March 8th, 1916. Germany is declared to have built a submarine that can go to the United States and back. Future insults therefore will be delivered by hand. Municipal fishshops are to be established in Germany. They will be closely associated, it is understood, with the Overseas News Agency, and will make a speciality of supplying a fish diet to sailors who are unfortunately prevented by circumstances...
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Owen Seaman
January 26, 1916. Some idea of the financial straits in which English people find themselves may be gathered from the statement that the first forced strawberries of the season fetched no more than ten shillings a pound. The Germans proudly point out that their forced loans fetched more than that. A kindly M.P. has suggested that our German naval prisoners should be employed in making the projected the...
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Owen Seaman
February 23, 1916. The threatened shortage of paper has led a few unkind persons to enquire upon what our diplomatic victories are hereafter to be achieved. An interned German was recently given a week's freedom in which to get married, and the interesting question has now been raised as to whether his children, when they reach the age of twenty-one, will be liable to the Conscription Act or will...
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Owen Seaman
March 15, 1916. The Zeppelin which was "winged" while flying over Kent last week has not yet been found, and is believed to be still in hiding in the densely wooded country between Maidstone and Ashford. Confirmation of this report is supplied by a local farmer, who states that on three successive nights the cat's supper has been stolen from his scullery steps. This strange circumstance,...
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Owen Seaman
March 1, 1916. The Volunteers have at last been recognised. There has been nothing like it since the great recognition-scene in Electra. The case has been reported of a Stepney child which has developed a disease of the brain, as the result of an air raid. Similar cases are said to have been observed in the neighbourhood of Fleet Street. It now transpires that the music of St. Paul's Cathedral...
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Owen Seaman
June 7, 1916. A correspondent writes to tell us of a painful experience which he has had in consequence of his efforts to practise war-time economy in the matter of dress. The other evening, after going to bed at dusk in order to save artificial light, he was rung up by the police at 1 A.M. and charged with showing a light. It appears that he had gone to bed with his blind up, after throwing his...
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Owen Seaman
CHARIVARIA. Portugal is now officially at war with Germany, and the dogs of frightfulness are already toasting "der Tagus." At first the report that Enver Pasha had gone to pay a visit to the tomb of the Prophet at Medina caused a feeling of profound depression in Constantinople; but it is now recognised that there was no other course open to him, as Mahomet was not in a position to visit the...
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