Games/Humor Books

"PLEASING THE PIGS!" (From a Private and Confidential Report.) Mr. CHAPLIN received a deputation on the subject of the Swine-fever last week. True to his dramatic instincts as regards the fitness of things, the Minister for Agriculture was, on this occasion, wearing a Sow-wester. He regretted that he was unable to don a pig-tail, which, as the representative of the Fine Old English Gentleman of... more...

JIM'S JOTTINGS. No. II.—RATS'-RENTS, THE RENTERS AND THE RENTED. [In which GINGER JIMMY gives his views of Lazarus, Dives, Dirt, Mother Church, Slum-Freeholders and "Freedom of Contract."] "The Golgotha of Slumland!" That's a phrase as I am told Is made use of by a party,—wich that party must be bold,— In the name of Mister LAZARUS, a good Saint Pancrage gent, Wot... more...

CHAPTER III. Reims—Night—Streets—Arrival—Lion d'Or—Depression—Landlady—Boots—Cathedral—Loneliness—Bed. It is just ten o'clock. Reims seems to be in bed and fast asleep, except for the presence in the streets of a very few persons, official and unofficial, of whom the former are evidently on the alert as to the movements, slouching and uncertain, of the latter. We drive... more...

"'TIS MERRY IN HALL.""Knock'd 'em!""What's in an 'at without an 'ed?" DISTAFFINA DE COCKAIGNE was wont to inquire, and "what's an 'all" (of Music like the London Pavilion) "without a NED" in the shape of Mr. EDWARD SWANBOROUGH, the all-knowing yet ever-green Acting Manager at this place of entertainment, who possessing the... more...

THE WAITERS' STRIKE. (At the Naval Exhibition.) The German Waiter waxeth fat; he grows exceeding proud; He is a shade more kicksome than can fairly be allowed. The British Press goes out to dine—the Teuton, they relate, Throws down his napkin like a gage, and swears he will not wait. Now there are many proverbs—some are good and some are not— But the Teuton was misled who cried, "Strike... more...

WRESTLING WITH WHISTLERS. (A Reminiscence of a Recent Exhibition.) SCENE—The Goupil Gallery. Groups of more or less puzzled Britons discovered, conscientiously endeavouring to do justice to the Collection, having realised that Mr. WHISTLER's work is now considered entitled to serious consideration, but feeling themselves unable to get beyond a timid tolerance. In addition to these, there are... more...

TOWN THOUGHTS FROM THE COUNTRY. (With the usual apologies.) Oh, to be in London now that April's there, And whoever walks in London sees, some morning, in the Square, That the upper thousands have come to Town, To the plane-trees droll in their new bark gown, While the sparrows chirp, and the cats miaow In London—now! And after April, when May follows And the black-coats come and go like... more...

THE TRAVELLING COMPANIONS. No. IX. SCENE—The Burg Terrace at Nuremberg. PODBURY on a bench, grappling with the Epitome of SPENCER. Podbury grappling with the Epitome of Spencer. Podbury (reading aloud, with comments). "For really to conceive the infinite divisibility of matter is mentally to follow out the divisions to infinity, and to do this would require infinite time." You're right... more...

"AS GOOD AS A BETTER." Dr. Andrew Wilson (in "Science Jottings," in the Illustrated London News) dares disparage Golf "as an ideal game for young men," venturing to advocate the preferential claims of fogeyish Cricket, and even of futile Lawn Tennis— "O Scots, wha hae wi' BALFOUR teed." What wull ye say to this disloyal, slanderous, sacrilegious ANDY? He hints... more...

"SAVE ME FROM MY FRIENDS!" SCENE—A Place of Meeting. Enter Parliamentary Leader and his Subordinate. They greet one another effusively. Leader (cordially). And now, my dear fellow, how are my interests? Sub. (with much heartiness). Getting on capitally! Just been writing to all the papers to say that it is stupid to call you "Old Dot-and-go-one," because it is inapplicable to either... more...