Non-Classifiable Books

CHAPTER I FAT A fat man is a joke; and a fat woman is two jokes—one on herself and the other on her husband. Half the comedy in the world is predicated on the paunch. At that, the human race is divided into but two classes—fat people who are trying to get thin and thin people who are trying to get fat. Fat, the doctors say, is fatal. I move to amend by striking out the last two letters of the... more...

MY GARDENING. I. The contents of my Bungalow gave material for some "Legends" which perhaps are not yet universally forgotten. I have added few curiosities to the list since that work was published. My days of travel seem to be over; but in quitting that happiest way of life—not willingly—I have had the luck to find another occupation not less interesting, and better suited to grey hairs... more...

I HAVERHILL The whole valley of the Merrimac, from its source among the New Hampshire hills to where it meets the ocean at Newburyport, has been celebrated in Whittier's verse, and might well be called "Whittier-Land." But the object of these pages is to describe only that part of the valley included in Essex County, the northeastern section of Massachusetts. The border line separating New... more...

Charles Frohman:an Appreciation By James M. Barrie The man who never broke his word. There was a great deal more to him, but every one in any land who has had dealings with Charles Frohman will sign that. I would rather say a word of the qualities that to his friends were his great adornment than about his colossal enterprises or the energy with which he heaved them into being; his energy that was like... more...

Letter I: Two months at sea—Melbourne. Port Phillip Hotel, Melbourne. September 22d, 1865. .... Now I must give you an account of our voyage: it has been a very quick one for the immense distance traversed, sometimes under canvas, but generally steaming. We saw no land between the Lizard and Cape Otway light—that is, for fifty-seven days: and oh, the monotony of that time!—the monotony of it! Our... more...

I. IN WHICH WE TAKE PASSAGE ON THE LIMITED It was a December morning,—the Missouri December of mild temperatures and saturated skies,—and the Chicago and Alton's fast train, dripping from the rush through the wet night, had steamed briskly to its terminal track in the Union Station at Kansas City. Two men, one smoking a short pipe and the other snapping the ash from a scented cigarette, stood... more...

HEREas manye histories of olde & auncient antiquitie, and also al godly & Christiã writers most playnely consêt together, and agree in this, that dignitie, riches, kinred, worldly pompe, and renoume, doo neither make men better, ne yet happiar, contrarie too the blynde & fonde iudgement of the most part of menne: but by the power and strength of the mynde, that is, learnyng, wysedome,and... more...

THE JUKES Education is something more than going to school for a few weeks each year, is more than knowing how to read and write. It has to do with character, with industry, and with patriotism. Education tends to do away with vulgarity, pauperism, and crime, tends to prevent disease and disgrace, and helps to manliness, success and loyalty. Ignorance leads to all those things that education tries to... more...

THE AMERICAN TYPE OFISTHMIAN CANAL It was on June 14, 1906, when the Canal subject was up for final consideration, that Mr. Dryden addressed the Senate. The official records show that "S. 6191, to provide for the construction of a sea-level canal connecting the waters of the Atlantic and Pacific oceans, and the method of construction," was before Congress, and it was in opposition to this... more...

PREFACE The following stories are intended for children of various ages. The introductory chapter, 'A Talk about Saints,' and the stories marked with an asterisk in the Table of Contents, were written first for an eager listener of nine years old. But as the book has grown longer the age of its readers has grown older for two reasons: First: because it was necessary to take for granted some... more...