CHARIVARIA. The Cambridge University Boat Club has decided to spend £8,000 in improving the Cam. There is talk of making it into a river. Says a writer in a contemporary, "Don't live in a houseboat during a flood." And yet Noah always declared that he owed his life to having done so. The gentlemen who formed M. Ribot's Cabinet are objecting to being described as "The One-Day Ministry." They were, they assert, in office for some... more...

June 17th, 1914. CHARIVARIA. "The Pocket Asquith" is announced, and we are asked to say that the pocket in question is not Mr. Redmond's. The discovery of gold particles in a duck's gizzard has, we are told, caused a rush of mining prospectors to Liberty Township, Ohio. It is expected that the duck will shortly be floated as a limited liability company. The Valuation Department has discovered at Llangammarch Wells, Brecknockshire,... more...

January 28, 1914. CHARIVARIA. Lord Howard de Walden is starting a movement with the admirable object of reinvigorating the drama in Wales by forming a travelling troupe of first-rate actors. It is rumoured that an option has already been obtained on a native comedian who is at present a member of the Cabinet. The Chancellor of the Exchequer received last week a deputation of the Men of Kent in order to hear their views in support of... more...

FEBRUARY 4, 1914. CHARIVARIA. The statement, made at the inquiry into the Dublin strike riots, that 245 policemen were injured during the disturbances has, we hear, done much to allay the prevailing discontent among the belabouring classes. "Coaling the Stores" is a headline which caught our eye in a newspaper last week. To be followed, after the strike, we imagine, by "Storing the Coals." A Russian officer, last week, shot the... more...

February 18, 1914. CHARIVARIA. "I come," said Mr. Lloyd George last week, "from a farming stock right down from the Flood. The first thing a farmer wants is to be secure." It was of course during the Flood that the insecurity of land tenure was most noticeable. Lord Carrick, who a few months ago was appearing in a sketch at the Coliseum, seconded the Address in the House of Lords. We are glad to note the growth of ties between... more...

February 11, 1914. CHARIVARIA. Sir Edward Grey is to accompany the King on his visit to Paris in April next. Nobody will grudge the Foreign Minister this little treat, which he has thoroughly well earned. According to The Express the South African police discovered an elaborate plot for kidnapping all the Ministers as a preliminary to declaring a Labour Republic. In Labour circles, however, it is declared that the scheme was drawn up... more...

APRIL 22, 1914. CHARIVARIA. Says The Times:—"It used to be a tradition of British Liberal statesmanship to support, without prospect of immediate advantage, the cause of nationality and freedom abroad.... It would at least be showing some interest to send a minister to Durazzo." Here, perhaps, is a post for poor Mr. Masterman. The Kerry News states that it prefers pigs to Englishmen. This seems a queer—almost an... more...

APRIL 15, 1914. CHARIVARIA. Reuter telegraphs from Melbourne that the Commonwealth building in London is to be called "Australia House." This should dispose effectively of the rumour that it was to be called "Canada House." "The Song of the Breakers," which is being advertised, is not, we are told, a war song for the Suffragettes. Some of the Press reported a recent happy event under the following heading:— "Wedding of... more...

APRIL 1, 1914. CHARIVARIA. We are sorry to hear that the Premier is suffering from a troublesome Gough. Poor Mr. Asquith, as though he had not already worries enough, is getting into trouble for sending an exclusive statement to The Times. He now stands convicted by his own party of being a Times-server. The Premier Magazine is announced for sale. Is this, we wonder, the Powder Magazine on which he has been sitting? At one... more...

CHARIVARIA. The German claim that as the result of the Zeppelin raid "England's industry to a considerable extent is in ruins" is probably based on the fact that three breweries were bombed. To the Teuton mind such a catastrophe might well seem overwhelming. A possible explanation of the Government's action in closing the Museums is furnished by the Cologne Gazette, which observes that "if one wanted to find droves of Germans in London one... more...